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Writing process

Where I’d like to be

Gold Coast, Queensland

We have been so busy lately. Right now I’d love to be somewhere else.

We’ve holidays coming up in December, so it’s not that far away, but that’s one of the things that’s making us work harder.

I’m exhausted.

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Writing process

It’s goodbye to another laptop

Sometimes the writing flows, sometimes it doesn’t, and while I prefer writing on a desktop to a laptop, the first drafts of our novels have been produced on laptops.  That’s because many of them have been written on our work commute.

The first basic requirement for me has always been, “Can the laptop fit into my handbag?”

This is my third laptop since we started writing the Linesman novels.  The first was a little 10” Acer Aspire netbook that even ten years ago only cost around $300.   It was a solid little workhorse that lasted four years.  The second was a slightly larger laptop (11”) that weighted four times as much.

That laptop put my back out, broke at least two bags, and crystallised my second requirement.  “How heavy is it?”  Carrying four kilograms of PC every day wasn’t fun.

I bore it for six months, then bought the little Sony 11” Vaio that I’ve had for the last five years.

That’s nearing the end of its life, now.  The shift keys are broken.  I have to press hard on other keys to make them work.  The touchpad isn’t sensitive any more (thank goodness for touch screen functionality, which has saved my writing lots of times), and it keeps selecting chunks of text (sometimes the whole novel) with disastrous consequences if I don’t notice and typing.

Four to five years seems to be the average life of my laptops.  That’s pretty good, given the amount of work they do.

It’s time to go shopping.

Charles Babbage built his analytic engine back in 1837.  Konrad Zuse built the first programmable computer, the Z1, in the 1930s.  (He built it in his parent’s living room, and if you’ve ever seen a picture of it, it was a big machine.  He must have had very forbearing parents.)  Every one of us alive today was born in an age of computers.

There’s a massive difference between a computer bought in the year 1998, and a computer bought in 2008.  Not so much between one bought in 2008 and 2018.  I mean sure, there’s more memory and more power, and some of them are a little lighter, and there are a few more apps, but you know what I’m going to be using my new laptop for?  Word processing.  And that’s exactly the same thing I was using it for ten years ago.

I’m even going to be using the same word processing software. Microsoft Word.

Sure, we have things like mobile phones and tablets nowadays, but try writing a story on them.  Until writers come up with a different way of writing stories—maybe by dictation—we’re still going to need a keyboard and a screen.  That limits the technology somewhat.

Categories
Fun stuff Writing process

Answers to “Can you recognise this book, movie, …”

How did you go with last week’s quiz, where we asked you to identify the book, movie, television series, play or poem based on a few words

1. 42

Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy a novel by Douglas Adams.

The number 42 was the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything. A super computer, Deep Thought, was created to come up with the answer, which it did, although it took seven and a half million years to do it, and by then, no one knew what the original question was.

2. A handbag

The Importance of Being Earnest a play by Oscar Wilde.

As children, we devoured books, especially second-hand books we’d get from the opportunity shops. Back in those days, there were a lot books about girls going to boarding school.  The Merry books, by Clare Mallory, were our absolute favorites.  In Merry Begins (I think), they put on a play—The Importance of Being Earnest—and that line, about the handbag, came up in the book.  It wasn’t till years later that we actually saw the play.

3. As you wish

Princess Bride.  The book was written by William Goldman—which I confess I haven’t read—but I have seen the movie so many times I can almost say the lines along with the characters. There are so many quotable quotes.  “Inconceivable.”  “Have fun storming the castle.”  “Only mostly dead.” And, of course, the absolutely unforgettable, classic, “My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”

4. Beam me up

“Beam me up, Scotty,” is from Star Trek, the original series.  Can’t say any more than that.

5. Elementary

I believe that in Arthur Conan Doyle’s books, Sherlock Holmes never said “Elementary my dear Watson.”  That came later, in the films.  Although Holmes did say the word, “Elementary,” in The Crooked Man.

The word—the phrase, in fact—is, however, indelibly associated with Sherlock Holmes.  So much so that a recent television series about a modern-day Holmes and Watson was called Elementary, and no explanation of the title was needed.

6. Frankly, my dear

A little bit of a cheat on this one, because it usually comes with the rest of the sentence.  “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.”

Yes, it’s Rhett Butler in the 1939 movie Gone With the Wind.  In Margaret Mitchell’s book the film was based on, I believe he said something more along the lines of “Frankly, I don’t give a damn.”

7. Friends, Romans, countrymen

Marc Antony’s speech from William’s Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar.  As children we had this game where we’d go around saying, “Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears, and we’d all make a play of taking off our ears and handing them to the person who asked.

The things kids do.

Even if you don’t go to see Shakespeare’s plays, he’s beautiful to read—aloud or silently.  He has this amazing way with words.  Not to mention, there’s so much that quotable.

8. Here, kitty, kitty, kitty

Yes, Kate Daniels’ first book.  Ilona Andrews’ Magic Bites, when Kate first meets Curran.

9. Houston, we have a problem

This quotation comes from the 1995 movie, Apollo 13, starring Tom Hanks, Kevin Bacon, Bill Paxton, Gary Sinise and Ed Harris.

It’s not quite a direct quotation from the real Apollo 13 mission, but they did say something similar.

10. I ate’nt dead

Esmeralda Weatherwax, from Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series.  Esmerleda goes out borrowing other bodies and while she does, her own body remains in a comatose state.  Hence she wears a sign “I ate’nt dead” to avoid embarrassing accidents.  (Note, ate’nt is where Esmeralda puts the apostrophe.)

11. It’s just a flesh wound

Monty Python’s film, the Holy Grail.  It’s said by the Black Knight, after he loses both arms.

12. More like guidelines, rather than rules

The actual words are “The code is more what you call guidelines, than actual rules.”  It comes from the movie Pirates of the Caribbean.  Captain Barbossa says this to Elizabeth, after she tries to invoke the pirate code.

13. My preciousss

I added the extra s’s myself.  From The Lord of the Rings films.  Gollum, of course.

14. No man is an island

This comes from a poem of the same name written by John Donne. There are two quotable quotes from the poem, the other being “for whom the bell tolls”, but that’s also the name of a novel published by Ernest Hemingway, so I used “no man is an island” instead.

15. Shaken, not stirred

Yes, Ian Fleming’s James Bond loves his martinis shaken, not stirred.

16. The best laid plans

Another poem, where the common quote isn’t quite the same as the real thing, because the actual words are “The best laid schemes”.

This is from Robbie Burns poem, To a Mouse. Again, another poem I love to read aloud and silently. Great poem.

17. To infinity and beyond

Buzz Lightyear’s famous catchphrase from the Toy Story films.

18. We don’t know where he are

A. B. (Banjo) Patterson is one of the giants in Australian literature.  This from one of his best-known poems, Clancy of the Overflow.

19. What is best in life?

Conan the Barbarian. The quote comes from the 1982 movie, not from the Robert E. Howard books.  I believe the scriptwriter took the quote from an earlier book about Genghis Khan, not written by Howard.

While I know the quote, the closest I’ve ever been to Conan is a beta read I did of another author’s book.  He told me it was in the style of Conan the Barbarian. 

“I haven’t read Conan,” I said, “But I’ll beta read if you want me to.”

I can’t remember how good the story was or wasn’t, because by the end I was so frustrated by the women in the book, who were all dumb objects, just along to further the main character’s story.  If I recall my critique came back something along the lines of, “I found it difficult to warm to your protagonist.  I also feel you are likely to alienate half your potential readership by your portrayal of women.  Maybe you should give them more active roles.”

From what I’ve read since, the author sounds as if he got exactly what he was trying for.  A Conan-type story.  I have to say, my feedback was useless to him.

20. You can’t handle the truth

Jack Nicholson’s immortal line in the 1992 movie A Few Good Men.

Daniel Kaffee (Tom Cruise): “I want the truth.”

Colonel Jessup (Jack Nicholson): “You can’t handle the truth.”

An excellent movie.

Categories
Fun stuff

Can you recognise this book, movie or play from a couple of words?

Whoa.  This year is zooming by.  This post comes to you an hour earlier than normal, courtesy of daylight savings, which started last night.  We were just saying this morning how lovely it was to wake to full daylight, too.  (I’m not sure whether to be happy or concerned that this year all the clocks in my house adjusted their time automatically.  Including my chill alarm clock, because everything’s online.)

At work we’ve already started the mad scramble to Christmas.  Booking holidays, booking end-of-year functions.  Honestly, once upon a time we’d just book the local pub a couple of days before our end-of-year party and we’d all trundle down.  Nowadays, you book in October, or earlier, and places can still be booked out.

In no time at all, it’ll be 2019.

But, in the meantime, let’s have some fun.  There are some words and phrases that you can instantly associate with a book, a television series, a movie, or even a play.

“I’ll be back,” for example, is forever associated with the Terminator movies.  So here’s a list of—for us—well known words or phrases that we associate with a specific book, movie, television series, poem or play.

How many do you know?

  1. 42
  2. A handbag
  3. As you wish
  4. Beam me up
  5. Elementary
  6. Frankly, my dear
  7. Friends, Romans, countrymen
  8. Here, kitty, kitty, kitty
  9. Houston, we have a problem
  10. I aten’t dead
  11. It’s just a flesh wound
  12. More [like] guidelines, rather than rules
  13. My preciousss
  14. No man is an island
  15. Shaken, not stirred
  16. The best laid plans
  17. To infinity and beyond
  18. We don’t know where he are
  19. What is best in life?
  20. You can’t handle the truth