Sherylyn’s opinion of Barrain so far…
This draft is definitely better, but Mathers simply would not do what he was doing. Mathers is not a ‘bad’ policeman. He would not overlook the obvious.
He might start out believing the dead body was Caid, but if all the evidence—and that’s every single piece—points to that being impossible, why does he continue to insist he must be right?
This is where the value of the co-writer comes in.
Left to myself I would have Mathers insist on the body being Caid’s all through the book, but I can’t do that now, my co-writer won’t let me.
I can already see some flow-on consequences.
Mathers’ relationship with his partner will definitely change. They’ll be more buddies than antagonists, working together on a case that doesn’t make sense, rather than at loggerheads all the time.
His relationship with Scott will change too. Scott changes from being a suspected murderer to a victim.
This changes every police scene from here on.
It’s becoming a markedly different story.