My alarm clock died. It was an old am/fm clock radio I’d had for years. Probably at least ten. I mean, how often do you think to change your clock radio? For a while I did the modern thing—used my phone as an alarm instead—but it was tedious having to pick up the phone to see the time when I was used to waking up and glancing at the clock. Anyway, nights were for charging phones, not using it, and the charger was in the other room.
So I bought a new clock.
A new DAB radio, and I could connect through to my phone onto if I wanted to, with lots of features. Want to have a weekday alarm and a weekend alarm? Yes, please. (I know, some people would turn the weekend alarm off, but I like waking to music.)
I followed the instructions. Set the time. Pre-set stations. Set the alarms.
It was so easy to set up.
It took time to work out what stations I wanted to hear. I want a mix of old and new music, with a bit more emphasis on the new. (Middle-of-the-road if such a term still exists.) News on the half-hour, weather. Not too much talkback.
Talkback drives me crazy when I’m just waking up. And before my radio died it only got one station for six months. A golden-oldies station that stopped at the Beatles era. About then, if I never heard a fifties song again, I’d have been happy. Especially when they all sounded so tinny on my old, dying radio.
I chose a weekday station and set the alarm. Again, it was easy.
Now for the weekend station. What should I choose?
I scroll through my options. Chill. What’s that? I check out the details. The soothing sounds of world music.
I like world music. Soothing sounds. I imagine the music they play at meditation groups and when you go to the beautician. What about waking up to that? I can lie in bed and relax for half an hour before I get up.
I listen to half a song. Not great, but okay.
I set my weekend alarm an hour later than weekdays. I don’t want to sleep in too late, but I want some sleep in.
I’m all done, and it was so simple.
For the next week I enjoy waking up to an alarm I can hear, an alarm that doesn’t play fifties music. Bliss.
Then comes the weekend.
I’m dragged awake by the most awful music. I listen to it for half an hour and pull myself out of bed. I can’t listen any more.
Next day, it’s the same.
Two weeks of this and I know I have to change it. I scramble out of bed and find the first station with a song I like. Bliss. I’m so happy I go back to sleep.
Next day the alarm comes on. Guess what it’s playing?
Chill.
This time I go back to the setup guide that came with the clock. I follow the instructions exactly as per the guide. I select my station, set the alarm. Next day, what comes up?
Chill.
I change the pre-programmed station, wipe Chill off the pre-programmed stations. Reset the weekend alarm and wait a week.
Come Saturday morning.
Chill.
It’s as if there’s some malevolent demon inside the clock and really likes Chill music. But I am not going to let this clock beat me. I’ll keep trying.
I will un-chill.